Why the Seattle Mariner's Value Menu = The Democratic Party
a flimsy poli-sci analogy
I’m not a poli-sci major. I’m not a registered Democrat. I’m not even particularly well read. What I AM though is an American. And a baseball fan. And obsessed with “value.”
Whether that means $1 dogs and $2 beers, finding the best reciprocal museum benefits in my town, maximizing the distance from where I’m going to where I park (stadiums, beaches, tourist attractions, etc.), finding the best deals at bars, or comparing credit card point ecosystems, I LOVE finding a deal. This may even include using my old college I.D. to get discounts. No Adam, it’s not “grifting.” I’m “giving others an opportunity to be charitable” (that’s a reference to an argument for a future post).
A few months ago the Seattle Mariners released their new “Value Menu.” Because I live in Lakeland, FL it took me until August, the release of the 2026 MLB schedule, and a text message from a similarly value-obsessed friend of mine to clock the news and fully process it. BTW, an interleague series between the New York Yankees and the New York Mets from 9/11 - 9/13 to honor the 25th anniversary of 9/11 is a nice touch from the MLB. I’ll probably cry.
Anyway, the Mariner’s value menu lists 14 menu items at the “$5 or less” price point, as well as 8 alcoholic beers and 4 NA options. These range from 12oz Miller Lites ($5) to the 16oz value draft option “pFriem Lager” at the $8 price point.
When my friend broke the news I read the headline and was initially excited. I love value menus. I LOVED the Camden Yard “Birdland Value Menu” ($5 beers, $4 dogs, $2.50 peanuts). But then I clicked into the Mariner’s Menu and it was… weird? Sure, they have beers, dogs, and peanuts ($5, $4.50, $3.50 respectively), but they also have… Hot Mama Pickles ($3.50)? And Pocky Stix ($2.50)? And Little Bites Mini Muffins ($3.50)?
….Cool? …I guess?
I reacted so negatively to these deals that the friend who sent me the initial story asked if I was feeling alright. And yeah, I’m feeling fine, but the menu just seems strange? And the deals aren’t THAT great. When I did some research for this post, the real story is the “value tickets.” At almost 40% of Mariner’s home games you can get a ticket for $10. Which brings your total for a ticket, a dog, and a beer to just under $20, and when you put it that way the value menu is awesome. I reacted unfairly. But this isn’t about the thoughtful reaction to the value menu. This is about the knee-jerk, upset, and irrational reaction.
I won’t speak for all baseball fans, but I don’t want weird value options like a Big Papa Pickle. No not a typo, that is a separate option from the Hot Mama Pickle. I just want good food and consistently good prices. And these value meals are in response to the crazy concession prices we’ve gotten used to over the last 20 years. Crazy concession prices that have greatly outpaced the pace of inflation. The ballpark is no longer a family friendly affair. It feels like sporting events are a rich man’s game. What are we going to do? Is the solution really discounted Pocky Stix?
So where does the Democratic Party fit into all of this? Well. In my perspective - and again I’m not an analyst, I just watch the news and read the internet - where “we” went wrong in the last 10 years is that “we” ignored the American people. We did a bad job listening.
For 10 years the American people said “things are too expensive” and that they didn’t feel like their lives were getting better, and that there wasn’t enough housing or jobs. And instead of listening to the people. Instead of saying “we hear you” and pointing to lowest common denominator change, we said “what are you talking about? You’re crazy.” We pointed to the NASDAQ and said “no things are great,” while voters were screaming in agony! We pushed DEI and policed what people can and can’t say. And I’m not saying we don’t need to be more inclusive. I’m not saying we should be unkind with our language. What I’m saying is that most voters don’t care. And I’ve caught myself not caring. I have to remind myself to care about all of that other stuff on TOP of the prices of eggs. Because that stuff important.
The thing is that for the last 10 years someone has been saying “I hear you and I’ll fix it.” And even though he was lying, the American people can be gullible. He did a better job listening. For the last 10 years, the People have been begging for affordable tickets and concessions and instead we’ve been giving them Hot Mama Pickles, Pocky Stix, and Little Bites Mini Muffins.
Now upon further review the value menu is just awesome. Better prices don’t hurt us. There really are no losers. That’s why it’s a flimsy analogy, but I was initially inspired. I still stand by what I said. If we don’t listen and respond better to what real people are actually saying, we will continue to lose. And as the great Billy Beane once said.
I hate losing. I hate it. I hate losing even more than I want to win. And there’s a difference.
MUSICAL CODA